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Friday, 17 March 2023

FEATURE: Was the Moonswatch 'Mission to Moonshine' Really a Complete Disaster?


Like many of you I'm sure, I watch a fair number of YouTube 'watch channels' and while they do serve a purpose - whiling away a tedious dinner break for example, the older I get the more irritating I find them. Most recently my irritation has come in the form of the mock outrage directed at the Swatch 'Mission to Moonshine'. 

As I'm sure you know, unless you have been living under a rock this last few weeks, Swatch recently released a new version of one of their plastic 'Speedmasters' with a gold plated chronograph second hand, which unfortunately did not live up to the 'hype' created before the release... and so people, they got MAD about it.

Pre-release speculation... 

As far as I can tell, Omega didn't really do that much to create hype other than announce the release (which they kind of had to since it was only being sold in four places for one day), but of course the internet went mad speculating about all kinds of stupid ideas and then they got the hump when it turned out that the watch wasn't in fact a solid gold Swatch at all. No really?

This lead to the Mission to Moonshine being branded an absolute 'failure' by all and sundry, despite the fact that hundreds of people queued up in freezing weather to buy one. Granted there weren't riots this time and nobody got stabbed, but still I'm pretty sure Swatch sold every single watch they had in the back of those Fiat 500s... so maybe a 'complete failure' is a bit strong. No?

Watch enthusiasts or flippers? You decide...

As supporting evidence, people pointed to the booklet that came with the watch which made all sorts of hilariously spurious claims about the gold being mined under a full moon, or the hands being manufactured under a full moon... something about a full moon anyway. And of course the watches were sold on a full moon too... which was also super important.

This booklet was such obvious Swiss-industry trolling nonsense that no one should have taken it seriously, but instead it was held up as further proof that the Mission to Moonshine sucked huge, hairy donkey balls... but, I ask myself, if H Moser would have done this, would the reaction have been different? I'm pretty sure it would... because Moser are the absolute dahlings of the watch community and everything they say and do is just hilarious and subversive and disruptive and other popular buzz words. 

Pre-release speculation... 

Is the Mission to Moonshine remotely exciting? No, not really. Does it merit all the huffing and puffing? No, not really. Was it a complete failure? No. Clearly not. Could Swatch have done a better job of making clear that the whole 'Moonshine' thing wasn't to be taken 100% seriously? Well, yes... unless it was serious - in which case they need a slap.

Be that as it may, this need for everyone to jump on the Swatch/Omega bashing bandwagon is tiresome and reminds me of what YouTube was like a few years ago, when everyone and their dog queued up to make a video called 'Why TAG Heuer Sucks' or 'Are TAG Watches Any Good or Just Complete Dogsh*t?' Nothing's really changed, they've just got tired of putting one brand down and are looking for something else to criticise unnecessarily for no good reason (well actually for the very good reason of getting views for their channel - don't forget to like and subscribe!). Because if you can't think of a reason to put 'Rolex' in the title of your video right now, the next best thing is probably 'Moonswatch'.


Now I will admit that I'm not fan of Omega, and I find the Speedmaster about as boring as it's possible for any watch to be. And I will also somewhat shamefully confess that I did derive a tiny modicum of pleasure from the initial reaction, but after the third or fourth YouTube 'expert' posted a video about how the Mission to Moonshine was a disaster, when it really didn't merit anything more than an eye roll... I quickly became bored.

It's a shame, but it's indicative of how YouTube works and how the watch community works. Personally I would have absolute respect for any 'expert' who bucked the trend and said they actually liked it and thought it was great. As yet, I am yet to see one. Because who would put their head above the parapet and voice an honest opinion when it's so much easier to join the crowd in tutting and shaking your head. The whole thing has really just become a huge circle jerk where everyone agrees with each other, fearful of voicing an opinion that deviates from the communal consensus - God knows we can't expect an honest opinion from the watch media anymore, but it seems like YouTube has gone the same way. 


Swatch aren't saving lives, Swatch aren't curing cancer. Swatch are in the business of selling watches. They put a gold plated hand on a watch that was already difficult to get and sold them in exclusive locations. I wouldn't mind betting that most of those people posting videos about what a disaster the watch was would have jumped at the opportunity to buy one if it didn't involve a five hour queue.

Well there we are, that's got that off my chest. And I promised myself I wouldn't write about any more stupid Moonswatches! 

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